 “Everything You Want is on the Other Side of Fear.” – Jack Canfield As a Coach, I absolutely love working with clients around their fears. Why? Because I know that their fears and discomfort are the gateway to their growth and success. You see, fear stops us from becoming who we are truly meant to be in this world and from sharing our individual gifts and creativity with others. Fear holds us back and stops us from living the life we truly desire to live. Now, I am not talking about the kind of fear we experience when being held up by gunpoint or in a life-threatening situation. I am referring to the tendrils of fears that grip our gut and squeeze our chest when we think of going after a goal or desire, want to speak our truth to someone, or to share a new idea out loud. These sensations arise hand in hand with whispers of “you can’t do that, you will fail, or you don’t know enough” and, of course, my all time favorites “what will people think?” and “everyone will know you are a fake, an imposter.” These fears of what we imagine others will think or what we imagine will happen become self-sabotaging stories that we tell ourselves. These stories rob us of our power. They fill us with doubt, steal our self-worth, and can become self-fulfilling prophecies over time. Within them, we stay trapped and unable to step out of our comfort zone, unable to take new actions towards our true power and potential. Within them, we stay the same. You see, in order to change the results we are getting in life, in order to truly achieve the growth and success we desire, we must change the stories we tell ourselves. The first step is to become aware of them, and understand their purpose in keeping us safe and playing small. We then can practice leaning into, instead of away from, the doubts and fears they produce. We can start to see these fears as something we should navigate towards, not away from. When we practice this, we learn to move through our fears instead of being stopped by them. They become smaller, their grip in our body loosens, and we find ourselves growing and achieving. We find ourselves free of self-doubt and low self-worth. Success that seemed impossible becomes possible. When a client can speak to their fears and are ready and eager to act, to keep moving forward in spite of them, then I know we are on to something really exciting! What fears are keeping you from your dreams and desires? What opportunities would you create for yourself by facing your fears? I’d love to hear! -Coach Augusta   Our October theme this month at FromWithin Coaching is FEAR…sure, it is a kitschy theme based on the fact that October is the “watch every scary movie every created in the next 30-days”, but as Coaches and Career Communications’ Specialists, we face FEAR everyday with our Clients. FEAR of not being enough, FEAR of not being good enough to get their dream job, FEAR of asking for a raise, FEAR of writing their resume, FEAR of LinkedIn, FEAR of spiders (ok, so that isn’t something we coach on, but come on, spiders are NOT very fun to look at…) Because we face FEAR every day with our Clients, we remind them that FEAR has many different meanings and can have many different definitions than normally thought of when you look at FEAR as an acronym. Those acronyms include: False Evidence Appearing Real Face Everything And Rise For Everything A Reason Feeling Excited And Ready Face Everything And Recover False Expectations Appearing Real Failure Expected And Received Future Events Already Ruined Fighting Ego Against Reality False Emotions Appearing Real Forget Everything And Relax Forgetting Everything is All Right Frantic Effort to Avoid Reality What you see from this list is that FEAR is often what you make it. Or don’t make it. In doing research for this blog post, I came across Dr. Pamela D. Garcy’s article on her use of the The F-E-A-R System to help her clients work through their FEAR. The F-E-A-R System she uses stands for Focus, Expose, Approach, Rehearse. F = Focus instead of freaking out E = Expose instead of escape A = Approach instead of avoid R = Rehearse a lot What she is suggesting is lean into the FEAR because often, what we think is going to happen (or is happening) is FAR from what reality is. It would not be a proper blog post on FEAR for me to write if I didn’t include one of my favorite quotes/stories on FEAR that Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat, Pray, Love wrote in her book on writing, Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear. “I even have a welcoming speech prepared for fear, which I deliver right before embarking upon any new project or big adventure. It goes something like this: “Dearest Fear: Creativity and I are about to go on a road trip together. I understand you’ll be joining us, because you always do. I acknowledge that you believe you have an important job to do in my life, and that you take your job seriously. Apparently, your job is to induce complete panic whenever I’m about to do anything interesting—and, may I say, you are superb at your job. So, by all means, keep doing your job, if you feel you must. But I will also be doing my job on this road trip, which is to work hard and stay focused. And Creativity will be doing its job, which is to remain stimulating and inspiring. There’s plenty of room in this vehicle for all of us, so make yourself at home, but understand this: Creativity and I are the only ones who will be making any decisions along the way. I recognize and respect that you are part of this family, and so I will never exclude you from our activities, but still—your suggestions will never be followed. You’re allowed to have a seat, and you’re allowed to have a voice, but you are not allowed to have a vote. You’re not allowed to touch the road maps; you’re not allowed to suggest detours; you’re not allowed to fiddle with the temperature. Dude, you’re not even allowed to touch the radio. But above all else, my dear old familiar friend, you are absolutely forbidden to drive.” I invite you today to respect the FEAR that arises today in your life…but don’t allow it to drive you. Not scared, Coach Amy  |
AuthorThe authors of these blogs include incredible Coaches and Writers at FromWithin Coaching who are inspired to share their thoughts, ideas, comments, and possibilities with YOU, the reader. Archives
June 2025
Categories
All
|
RSS Feed